How many altos does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
None, they can’t get that high.
How many sopranos does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
One, she holds it up and waits for the world to revolve around her.
How many singers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Two. An alto to actually do it and a soprano to stand by and ask “isn’t that a little high for you?”
When people say ‘This is my baby,’ they don’t always mean a baby. Sometimes they mean a dog. - A Somali student, on what has surprised her most about the United States. (via africandogontheprairie)